Love - Romance - Relationship

5 Signs You're Headed Toward a Breakup

2010-02-05T23:08:00.000-08:00

YAHOO.COM. Have you ever found yourself in a relationship where the frustration level and the number of times you butt heads with each other seems to increase by the second? You say blue, she says red, and the fights just seem to be going in circles.

If the answer is yes, then you may be at what I call "the breakup point." Here are five signs that your relationship may be past the point of fixing. Whether you are living together, married, or just dating, these breakup signs are usually loud and clear.

1. You stop relationship-building behaviors. In the honeymoon stage of a relationship, which we all know is the first 90 days of pure bliss, you are learning about each other and making efforts to create romantic moods and nice evenings. When you're in that stage, you are really working at building your relationship. Then, at some point, you start to butt heads with each other. Critical relationship elements deteriorate. Maybe you stop kissing each other goodbye or stop texting each other during the day. Instead of adding things to the relationship, you start to resent each other like two five-year-olds who stop sharing their crayons. This is a breakup point.

2. You don't understand each other anymore. The fighting escalates to a place where you no longer feel like you're understood by your partner. Physical intimacy stops, communication stops, and you are living like roommates. You're at the point in the relationship where you are trying to understand each other, but you get so frustrated because you feel like you just don't understand each other anymore. This is a breakup point.

3. You start punishing each other. When you get to the point of no longer understanding each other, what happens is that you end up just kind of coexisting in the new dynamic. Resentment builds and you get in your head too much. You are no longer about feelings, and you start punishing each other. "Well, he hasn't done this for me, so I'm not going to do this for him" are the kind of thoughts that take root. The longer you stay in that dynamic and the further away you get from the dynamic you had during the early part of the relationship, the less likely it is that you'll ever get it back (and, after a point, you won't). You have hit the breakup point.

4. You fight less. When you get to the breakup point, you actually fight less with your partner. You fight less because in your mind and heart you start detaching yourself from the other person, and you don't care as much anymore. You have already made a determination that they don't understand you, that they will never understand you, and that the relationship just won't work out. The minute you get into a fight, you just walk away from it. That is a sure sign that you are at the breakup point.

5. You've taken the time to think it through. When you think you might have hit that breakup point, you must tell the person that you're disconnecting from them. You need to be honest and raw. If you don't think the relationship is going to work, or you know you've already disconnected based on how things have been going, then you might want to consider walking away for a week. When you're in the thick of things, they never seem to be able to work out.

So take a break. Spend a week without your partner. Take the week to ask yourself some questions. Go visit some friends or family. Really think about what life would be like without that person. How would you feel? Then, go back and either take a stand for the relationship or break up.

Whichever decision you make, you need to be honest with yourself. Life is too short! There are a lot of wonderful, amazing people out there ready to meet you.

Ten Tips for a Romantic & Memorable Valentine's Day

2010-02-01T22:18:00.000-08:00

From its earliest origins, Valentine’s Day has been associated with love. Centuries ago, the Romans celebrated a feast every February called Lupercalia. The celebration included a ritual for matching young, single men and women. Names were placed in a box, a drawing was held and couples randomly matched together were partners for a year -- after that it was up to them.

The Valentine’s Day gift you choose for your loved one and how you decide to spend the day says a lot about the quality of your relationship, so give something that has real meaning to you. Gifts from the heart don’t have to be expensive. Since the traditional gifts of flowers or chocolates don’t last forever, here are ten creative ways to express your love.

    * Create your own Valentine’s Day card. Compose a poem or an expression of love that expresses your personality.

    * Create a "recollection collection" scrapbook filled with favorite photographs, love letters, keepsakes from special occasions, and cherished mementos.

    * Make a CD of your favorite songs as a couple including love songs that you both enjoy listening to. Buy some romantic CDs, classic videos or DVDs and wrap them all together with red ribbon.

    * Jewelry is always a favorite. For the woman in your life, buy a heart-shaped locket and put a picture of yourself in it. Personalize the locket with your loved one’s initials so she’ll have something to wear that’s hers alone. Package it in a heart-shaped box or tied to fresh flowers. For your man, a good choice is the classic sterling silver ID bracelet or cuff links with his name or initials custom-engraved.

    * Give silk or glass flowers, which will last forever. If your beloved has a green thumb, give a flowering plant to put in the garden to enjoy year after year.

    * Prepare your loved one’s favorite dinner and serve it on a romantically set table and dine by candlelight on Valentine’s Day. For the sweetheart with a sweet tooth, make a decadent dessert such as a chocolate fondue with melted chocolate mixed with a touch of heavy cream, and serve it with fruit or cookies.

    * Give the man in your life a personalized gift for his favorite hobby such as personalized golf or tennis balls that say, “I love you,” “You’re a hit!” or “Be mine,” or a monogrammed humidor for cigars.

    * The gift of togetherness is precious, given today’s busy lifestyles. Plan a romantic, surprise weekend travel getaway. Take lessons together to share in each other’s interests like dancing, cooking or sailing. Hire a personal trainer to inspire you to exercise together, or visit a spa together. Spend a night out at the theater and have dinner at a quiet and romantic candlelit restaurant.

    * If you plan to propose on Valentine’s Day, hide the engagement ring in a box of candy or at the bottom of a heart-shaped flute filled with champagne. Buy a pair of monogrammed champagne flutes and make a toast with your favorite bubbly.

    * If you want to propose at home, sprinkle rose petals around the house. Place heart-shaped candles around your home to create the right mood. Then, enjoy a quiet, romantic evening. Create a banner that says, “Will you marry me?” and hang it outside her home.

For more information, visit www.lillianvernonproducts.com

10 Tips: Frugal Valentine's Day

2010-02-01T22:15:00.000-08:00

Do you have a honey, but not a lot of money? Try these economical ideas
By Laura T. Coffey

Valentine’s Day sure can be an expensive little holiday. Officials with Huntington Bank in Ohio estimate that many would-be Romeos will spend anywhere from $180 to $420 on this single celebration.

But wait: You say you’re still struggling to pay off your credit-card debt from December? Ouch!

Bearing in mind that money worries can be efficient and ruthless relationship killers, perhaps the worst Valentine’s Day gift you could give is anything that leaves you grappling with debt and debt-related stress. That said, you don’t have to appear cheap or forgo fun and romance altogether, either.

These tips can help you dream up an approach to this year’s celebration that is both meaningful and economical.

1. Get creative when it comes to dinner. You really don’t have to spend $85 to $250 on a romantic dinner at a restaurant. Why not have a nice candlelit dinner at home? You could even get all dressed up for it. If you know you’re going to be too tired to cook after work on Valentine’s Day, which falls on a Thursday this year, order a special meal ahead of time and pick it up on your way home.

2. Enjoy a little ambiance. If you both really want to go out on the town together, you could have coffee or a drink and dessert at an expensive café, restaurant or romantic bistro. This is a way to savor the atmosphere — and your date — without emptying your wallet.

3. Play hooky. OK, do NOT follow this tip if your job or your partner’s job is hanging in the balance. But if you’ve racked up some vacation time, or if your employer allows you to take personal days from time to time, why not see if you can take Friday, Feb. 12 or Monday, Feb. 15 off and turn Valentine's Day weekend into a three-day weekend for the two of you? Depending on where you live, the two of you could stroll through a park, walk on a beach, go snow-shoeing, take a rowboat or paddleboat out on a lake, or catch a matinee movie. You also could drive to a small town near your home or through neighborhoods you’ve never visited before and search for small, out-of-the-way places to eat or find public parks and open spaces for walks. You could do this at home, of course, or you could plan a short getaway that isn’t prohibitively expensive. For ideas on how to line up reasonably priced accommodations and find other travel deals, this past “10 Tips” column about saving money on summer travel contains tips that can be helpful at any time of year.

4. See some live music. Check to see whether a university or college in your area is offering any potentially enjoyable concerts on Feb. 14. Performances by the college music department would likely be free or cost a fraction of the price charged by professional orchestras and opera houses.

5. Seek out some silence. Here’s a potential date idea if you’ve both been stressed out lately: You could wander through libraries and bookstores with coffee shops that encourage browsing. Rediscover passages you love from your favorite books, and enjoy the quiet. (Cautionary note: Be careful not to go nuts buying $25 paperbacks! That could defeat the whole purpose of this tip!)

6. Have low-cost fun with food on Feb. 14. You can pull out the cookie cutters and make heart-shaped cookies and even cut your lunch sandwiches into hearts. You also can make heart-shaped cupcakes by placing a marble inside each muffin tin on the outside of the paper cupcake cup.

7. Give thoughtful gifts. Most people stick to the same general gift themes on Valentine’s Day: flowers, chocolates, cards, maybe a piece of jewelry. Can you think of something different that might mean a whole lot more — and maybe even cost a whole lot less? This past "10 Tips" column about how to avoid overspending during the holiday season includes a tip about making your own gifts. Such gifts could include cakes, cookies or gift certificates for your services. The gift certificate idea might be just the ticket for you if you’re short on cash but high on love this Valentine’s Day. You could offer to run errands for your loved one, make a nice dinner, clean the house, repair the car or give a massage.

8. Reflect on that flower purchase. If you’re sure your special someone will be devastated without the gift of flowers, then you probably should get some. But once again, you don’t have to follow the herd. Everyone opts for roses at this time of year, but there are plenty of other gorgeous and neglected (i.e., less expensive) flower varieties to choose from. And red isn’t your only option, either. You also could choose peach, pink or yellow. What’s more, if you place your flower order early, you stand to save as much as 15 percent on your purchase. And here’s another detail to consider: Does your partner love to garden and work in the yard? If so, a beautiful outdoor plant that will keep on living might be more appropriate than cut flowers that will quickly fade.

9. Write down how you feel. Using a package of inexpensive Valentines from the drug store or grocery store — or, for that matter, any kind of paper — you could write out dozens of reasons why you love your mate. Leave the messages all over the house, in both noticeable and hidden-away places. This is a gift that could keep on giving for weeks or months to come.

10. Plan ahead for next year. If Valentine’s Day is a holiday that matters to you and your significant other, make a mental note of how quickly it can sneak up on you after the big winter holidays in December. Think about realistic ways you can cut back on your spending so you’ll be able to use cash to cover all of the 2008-09 holidays without relying on credit cards and going into debt. Can you cut back on costly coffee drinks, snacks and sodas during your work day? Or maybe put off some discretionary purchases you’ve been thinking about making?

Sources:
# Shel Horowitz’s FrugalFun.com
# Michael Webb, author of “The RoMANtic’s Guide: Hundreds of Creative Tips for a Lifetime of Love”
# Living on a Dime
# Huntington Bank
© 2010 MSNBC Interactive. Reprints

URL: http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/17051768/ns/today_technology_and_money-10_tips/

Valentine Day Songs

2010-01-30T22:25:00.000-08:00

Music is a rare gift of nature to the human beings. It is a medium of conversation with God and when we meet a human being in love - this means we are certainly in touch with God. The ultimate act of loving is giving one's life for the other. Music is the very presence of God in the form of a human being for God is love. For lovers music is one of the most fascinating ways to express their love. And what can be a better gift to lovers than love songs which have the power to take the pain away, to help you through each day and last but not the least- to tell your beloved that you are their for him/her forever! Valentines Day is the perfect occasion to express your love and to show how much you care. These everlasting love songs will help you to say what you could not do before. So go ahead and have a rollicking Valentines Day.

    * All I Want to Do is Make Love to You - Heart
    * All Out Of Love - Air Supply
    * And I Love Her - The Beatles
    * And You Don't Remember - Mariah Carey
    * Angels - Robbie Williams

    * As Long As You Love Me - Backstreet Boys
    * Baby I Love You - Jennifer Lopez
    * Because I Love You - Jewel
    * Because You Loved Me - Celine Dion
    * Blessed - Christina Aguilera
    * Breaks My Heart - Monica
    * Breathless - The Corrs
    * But I Do Love You - Michelle Branch
    * Can't Help Falling In Love - Elvis Presley
    * Change The World - Eric Clapton
    * Crazy For You - Madonna
    * Dangerously In Love - Destiny's Child
    * Escape - Enrique Iglesias
    * Everything I Do, I Do It For You - Bryan Adams
    * Feel Like Making Love - George Benson
    * Give Me Your Heart - Backstreet Boys
    * Have You Ever Been In Love? - Celine Dion
    * How Did I Fall In Love With You? - Backstreet Boys
    * I Could Fall In Love - Selena
    * I Just Fall In Love Again - Carpenters
    * I'll Never Stop Loving You - Britney Spears
    * I'll Still Love You More - Trisha Yearwood
    * I Love You - Celine Dion
    * I Need Your Love Tonight - Elvis Presley
    * I've Been Thinking About You - Mariah Carey
    * I Will Always Love You - Whitney Houston
    * I Will Still Love You - Britney Spears
    * Let's Talk About Love - Celine Dion
    * Love For All Seasons - Christina Aguilera
    * Love Is All We Need - Celine Dion
    * Love Me Tender - Elvis Presley
    * Love Takes Time - Mariah Carey
    * Love Will Find a Way - Christina Aguilera
    * Make You Happy - Celine Dion
    * Making Love For Fun - Enrique Iglesias
    * My Heart Will Go On - Celine Dion
    * My Love Is Your Love - Whitney Houston
    * Never Forget You - Mariah Carey
    * Nobody Loves Me Like You Do - Whitney Houston and Jermaine Jackson
    * Open Off My Love - Jennifer Lopez
    * Please Don't Stop Loving Me - Elvis Presley
    * Power Of Love - Celine Dion
    * Remember Me - Marc Anthony
    * Saving All My Love For You - Whitney Houston
    * Shower Me With Your Love - Surface
    * Somebody Loves You - Crystal Gayle
    * Sometimes - Britney Spears
    * Still In Love - Brian McKnight
    * Straight From The Heart - Bryan Adams
    * Teddy Bear - Elvis Presley
    * Thank You For Loving Me - Bon Jovi
    * That's The Way I Like It - Backstreet Boys
    * That's When I'll Stop Loving You - N Sync
    * The One - Backstreet Boys
    * The One - Jennifer Lopez
    * The Way You Love Me - Faith Hill
    * The Woman He Loves - Alabama
    * Underneath Your Clothes - Shakira
    * Until You Come Back - Whitney Houston
    * Valentine - Martina McBride
    * Waiting For Tonight - Jennifer Lopez
    * What A Girl Wants - Christina Aguilera
    * We Can't Love Like This - Alabama
    * Whenever, Wherever - Shakira
    * When I Dream At Night - Marc Anthony
    * When I Fall In Love - Celine Dion
    * When You Love Someone - Bryan Adams
    * Where Do Broken Hearts Go? - Whitney Houston
    * Where Does My Heart Beat Now - Celine Dion
    * Who Do You Love? - Whitney Houston
    * Without You - Mariah Carey
    * You Belong To Me - Jennifer Lopez
    * You Belong To My Heart - Elvis Presley
    * You Drive Me Crazy - Britney Spears
    * You Give Me Love - Faith Hill
    * You Need Me - Mariah Carey
    * You're A Heartbreaker - Elvis Presley
    * You're So Cold - Mariah Carey
    * You're Still My Man - Whitney Houston
    * You'll See - Madonna
    * Your Song - Elton John
    * You Remind Me - Mandy Moore
    * You Take My Breath Away - Rex Smith
    * You Were Wonderful Tonight - Eric Clapton
    * You Will Be Mine - Faith Hill

Source: http://www.everythingvalentinesday.com/love-songs.html.

Askmen's Valentine's Day Gift Ideas

2010-01-30T22:10:00.000-08:00

Chocolates
Chocolates are a great noncommittal gift. Get her a box that emits class, not something from the drugstore, and get her a variety box if you don't know whether she's a caramel girl or more into truffles.
Relationship level: Not yet committed

Dog treats
When you've first met a girl, you're unlikely to know her likes, dislikes and diet restrictions. You always, however, know what kind of treats her dog (or any other pet she may have) will appreciate. Buying a gift that's healthy for her pet shows you're sensitive to her beloved buddy's well-being.
Relationship level: Not yet committed

Flowers
While a bouquet of red roses may be a bit overzealous for a first date, other flowers may send your message perfectly. Do some research and choose carefully; gardenias denote secret love, orchids are always lovely, showing beauty and refinement, while yellow roses mean friendship. Just be sure to order your flowers early because Valentine’s Day can be a busy time for this industry.
Relationship level: Works for all levels

Heart-shaped pendant
Pendants were practically designed for giving to new girlfriends: They’re sweet (but not too serious), pretty (but not distractingly eye-catching) and tailor-made to make her swoon on a daily basis.
Relationship level: New romance

Hand-dipped strawberries
Strawberries in chocolate are a trademark seduction treat; they wonderfully mix the romantic with sexual fantasy, without being as obvious as lingerie. Buy these pretty, tasty treats, and prepare to nestle down and share. Or better yet -- make them yourself.
Relationship level: New romance

Bed & breakfast getaway
Bed & breakfasts offer a unique mix of comfort and luxury. Moreover, plenty of B&Bs offer treats like wine tours and nature walks. If you’re looking to underscore the romance in a new relationship, a getaway is the way to do it -- and you will definitely sweep a new romantic partner off her feet with a local romantic trip.
Relationship level: New romance

Gold bracelet
This piece of jewelry reminds your girlfriend just how much your time with her has meant to you, while also providing her with something she’ll be more than happy to sport every day.
Relationship level: Long-term relationship

Espresso maker
A gift that gives her one of her favorite treats right at home is thoughtful and kind. After you’ve been together awhile, it’s possible you’ll be spending lots of long mornings at her place and a coffee maker is the perfect gift to let her know how much you’re looking forward to them.
Relationship level: Long-term relationship

Luxury lingerie
This gift sets a precedent for fun. It is a gift the two of you can share and will bring out the intimacy that your new union entails. On the whole, it is romantic and adventurous without being intimidating.
Relationship level: Long-term relationship

Gemstone earrings
Although gift demands change over the course of your relationship, one thing doesn’t: Jewelry will always melt her heart. Remind her, that after all this time, you love her as much as ever. Surprise her and make her feel extra special with this gift.
Relationship level: Newlyweds

Spa getaway
Show her that you’re looking out for her by giving her a treatment package from a local spa, or get one for the two of you to experience together. Either way, you’ll make her feel fresh and sexy -- this gift is straight from the heart.
Relationship level: Newlyweds

Couple cooking classes
Finding cooking classes in your area will indicate your interest in activities together; you’ll build cooperation skills and learn a new art.
Relationship level: Long-term relationship or newlywed

Source: Askmen.com

Some Valentine Idea

2010-01-30T21:51:00.000-08:00

Valentine's Day is one of the most romantic days in a year. So it is natural that each one of us wish to celebrate this day uniquely. But the question arises as to how to celebrate this wonderful day in a special way. Your Valentine's Day must be remarkable and should leave an unforgettable impression in the mind of your beloved. Use your own romantic and thoughtful ideas for creating a unique Valentine's day celebration. There are ample valentine ideas and tips but the first and foremost thing to be kept in mind is to create the love ambience around you and your beloved. Your valentine day gift to your beloved need not be expensive but it should be straight from the heart.

Valentine Day Ideas:

If you are aspiring for an exquisite Valentine's Day then just go through the touching valentine ideas or tips to make an ideal valentine's day.

A simple 'I Love You' with a kiss can set an awesome mood for a Valentine's Day.
Decorate his/her house with hearts, bows and ribbons.
Make arrangements for surprise flower bouquets.
Cook a dinner for two and decorate the room with heart-shaped candles.
Gift him/her with velvet full of fresh Valentine day's chocolates.
A romantic note asking him/her to be your valentine.
Send sweet love quotes.
Make your own Valentine's Day card which expresses your feelings.
Create a scrapbook 'recollection collection' and fill it with love letters, photographs, cherished mementos, etc.
A CD of his/her favorite songs.
A jewelry gift is awesome. A heart shaped locket for the lady love and a silver bracelet for him is just perfect.
Plan a special dinner for him/her either in a garden or a boat. A candle light dinner is just unforgettable.
Pamper your sweetheart by gifting her a spa session.
Pot a plant that will grow and loom for her.
Spend loads of quality time with him/her and clandestine visits to romantic gateways.
Gift him/her a nice cell phone for keeping endless communication.
Gift her a beautiful evening gown or apparel.
Dance with your valentine on Martina McBride's 'Valentine'.
Include a chocolate dessert in your romantic dinner.
Create a love song CD full of Valentine's Day songs.
Send flowers at workplace or home to him/her.
If he/she loves gadgets then gift a digital camera.

Source: http://www.mydearvalentine.com/valentine/idea-tips/

How To Be Romantic

2010-01-30T19:53:00.000-08:00

Em & Lo provide a formula for turning love into romance. Source: yourtango.com

Romance is contagious. So the best way to get your guy (or lady) to be more romantic is to be more romantic with him first. Here are 10 not-too-arduous ways to do just that.

1. Wax nostalgic. Ninety-eight percent of romance is remembering not to take each other for granted. So tap into long-lost crush feelings by regularly thinking back to those first exhilarating moments that made you fall in love: the first time you met, your first date, your first kiss, your first time naked together, the first time you had teary, face-holding, we-adore-each-other sex. Remember how lucky you thought you'd be if you ended up together for the long haul—especially during those moments when the way he chews is starting to annoy you.

2. Don't overshare. There's a fine line between intimacy and TMI. We're not so prudish as to suggest you should never pee in front of one another, but is it so much to ask that you keep your #2's private? And when it comes to eliminating errant nose, chin, and nipple hairs, it might be a good idea to lock the bathroom door. Ask that he do the same for you. Just think of it as quality alone time to pamper yourselves.

3. Go on dates. Someone told us recently that it's pathetically suburban to call it a "date night." We say, save "hip" for your wardrobe and music library and embrace the cheese in your relationship. There's a reason dinner-and-a-movie is a decades-long tradition—it works! Besides, if you don't call it a date night, how is your guy supposed to know that you want him to change out of his old college sweatshirt and act all date-like? Subtle hints don't work; calling it a date night does. If you really can't stand to say those two words, then help clue him in with a new tie for the occasion—or just ask him to wear a certain shirt that you love.

4. Exchange just-because gifts or treats. Don't wait for the officially designated romantic holidays—anniversaries, birthdays, and Valentine's Day—to give your partner a thoughtful present. Surprising him with something out of the blue shows that he's on your mind, that you don't take him for granted, and that you care all of the other non-holiday days of the year, too. If you're broke, just bring him breakfast in bed with his favorite section of the newspaper on a random Sunday (and yes, "favorite section of the newspaper" may also be a euphemism for "fantastic oral sex"). Remember to reassure him that he didn't somehow forget a major anniversary, otherwise his mind will be racing all day.

5. Engage in random PDA. Not to the point where you elicit pleas to "get a room," but just enough to increase your daily physical contact and prove to the world (or even just your cat) that you're in love. Hold hands whenever possible. Give a peck on the lips here and a hug there. And don't forget the occasional furtive pat on the bum. Studies have shown that even a 20-second hug raises oxytocin levels—and oxytocin is the Hallmark card of the hormone world.

6. Write love notes. No need to pen long, flowery love letters or corny poetry (though the romantic potential of a sweet and funny love haiku cannot be overestimated). Just write the occasional "thinking of you" email, put a surprise "miss you already" Post-It in his business trip suitcase, or draw a heart around your initials on the steamed bathroom mirror.

7. Brag about your partner in public. We understand the inclination to get together with your girlfriends and bitch about the annoying things your partner does (hey, we all do it). But it's nice to occasionally embrace the positive and speak glowingly about your fella's home improvement skills/parental instincts/bedroom acumen. Sure, you might annoy your friends who don't want to hear about how good you have it, but you'll feel even better about going home to your awesome relationship. Oh, and brag about him to friends when he's listening, too. Whether it's a new promotion or just something witty he said last night, we guarantee he'll swoon.

8. Compliment your partner. Speaking of his self-esteem: We all like to feel needed and desired, but guys especially. So lay the compliments on thick at home, too. Just because it's been established in your relationship that he can cook (and you can't), doesn't mean you can forgo the lavish praises of his famous homemade lasagna. And just because he doesn't spend as long as you do in front of the mirror doesn't mean he doesn't want to hear how attractive you find him—especially if he's experimenting with a new facial hairstyle.

9. Skydive together. Studies have shown that participating in adrenaline-revving activities together will help keep that spark lit. Bungie-jumping, whitewater rafting, streaking down Main Street in your home town—there's nothing like near-death experiences to bring a couple closer together.

10. Take a basket-weaving class together. Joint activities don't all have to be thrilling—studies have also shown that just the novelty is enough to make two people feel closer. If basket-weaving isn't your bag, join forces for a yoga class, a comedy show, a walking tour, a cooking class, cha-cha lessons, a movie script... hell, even just a double-date with the new couple in town (and no, that one wasn't a euphemism).

10 Steps to the Perfect Kiss

2010-01-30T19:38:00.000-08:00

You're looking into their eyes and they're gazing back. You both move in for the kiss... pause. Not to worry though. With these 10 steps, every kiss from the first to the next will be picture perfect.

Step 1. Look into your partners
eyes.
In anticipation of a kiss or to initiate a kiss, start by gazing into your partners eyes. Have you heard the phrase that the eyes are the windows
to a persons soul? It's true. When you gaze into your partners eyes, you'll learn their true feelings, emotions, and intentions. In an intimate situation, gazing into your partner's eyes sends an intimate message, letting them know that you want to get closer.

Step 2. Smile.
A small, suggestive small does wonders. If you want to find out if you're partner is interested, sending a suggestive smile will do the trick. If you get a smile back, you're good to go. If not, or if your partner looks down or away, you probably want to back off.

Step 3. Lean in closer.
Now that you know you're about to kiss, it's time to move in. To avoid awkwardness, move slowly. Moving in too fast can make your partner uncomfortable. As you move in, make sure that you're in a comfortable position.

Step 4. Engage in light touching.
Men: A nice touch (literally!) to the perfect kiss is to lightly touch her face as you move in. A light touch such as this promotes the feeling of intimacy between the two of you.

Step 5. Tilt your head.
Now that you're moving in, it's time to make sure that you're aligned with your partner. You want to tilt your head slightly so that your lips are lined up and there's no chance of a missed kiss. Watch as you tilt to make sure that your partner has already tilted.

Step 6. Relax your lips.
Make sure that your lips are relaxed and not tightly pressed together. The perfect kiss is pleasant, with your lips softly pressed together.

Step 7. Moisten your lips.
Lightly moistened lips make for a better kiss, so keep lip balm close. You obviously won't be able to whip out the lip balm when you're "in the moment", so prepare ahead of time. This is true for both men and women. If you're caught off guard, a quick lick of the lips will work for women. Men, you want to keep your lips a bit drier, so don't lick. Both men and women need to tread carefully here. Lips that are moistened too much can make for sloppy, slobbery kisses, while lips that are too dry make for unpleasant, rough kisses. Women, you may also want to wear a brighter red lipstick. Experts agree that the red lipstick sends sexual messages to men and is a perfect addition to the perfect kiss.

Step 8. Close your eyes.
Close your eyes as you're about to make contact. Some people feel awkward if their partner's eyes are open. Besides, you'll end up with a much more passionate kissing experience if you close your eyes and let the sensations drive you.

Step 9. Part your lips.
Now that your lips are relaxed, part them slightly as you begin contact. Don't open them too much or your partner may feel that you're 'swallowing' them. Don't keep them too closed either though because your partner may get the impression that you're not as 'in' to this kiss as they are.

Step 10. The kiss.
It's finally time for impact! Gently touch your lips to theirs and you have the perfect kiss. Be sure not to pull away too quickly. You want to take your time and enjoy it! When you do finally pull away, look your partner in the eyes again. A smile, an embrace, or a whisper letting them know that you enjoyed it are a nice way to end a kiss.

source: http://www.romancestuck.com/

What Women Want in Relationships?

2010-01-30T07:51:00.000-08:00

Besides the meaning of life and the ingredients of hot dogs, many a man has questioned "what exactly do women want?" We're not playing coy here, we know we're complex creatures. And, true, we operate on a different wavelength than men. The best example of our gender difference comes from an article we read last year about why men cheat. The most compelling testimony was from a transgender man who'd undergone hormone therapy during his transition. Thanks to testosterone, the man noticed less of an emotional attachment to sex and more of a physical urge to engage, regardless of consequences. Fascinating.

So, we're different. But, women aren't exactly the great mystery that men often make us out to be. The proof? We polled the YourTango staff and compiled a list of 10 simple things women want. Note: you won't find diamond rings or other fancy things anywhere on this list. While many women really do want luxury goods from men, when you break it down they are just physical representations of some of the points on this list. We promise.

Respect. Show us through your actions that you respect our opinions, careers, interests, friends, bodies and minds. You don't have to agree with all that we say or do, but try to honor our opinions as valuable contributions. Follow the golden rule and treat us as you would like to be treated: Be honest, fair, kind, and considerate.

Sex. Yes, we love sex. But, remember that there are four bases to cover in the bedroom, not just one. Try stopping at each base instead of being so focused on the home run—believe us, we'll thank you for it! Likewise, remember small physical touches like massages. One can never, ever, have too many shoulder rubs. And scratching our heads is pretty great, too.

Romance. It's another night on the couch with take-out and TiVo? Just because we're staying in doesn't mean the evening can't be romantic. Light a few candles and see where the night leads. Treat us like your girlfriend, even after we become your wife. Date nights, making out in the car, kissing like when we first started dating—all of the things that made us fall in love with you don't have to stop just because now there are bills to pay, a house to be cleaned, and kids that need to get bathed. Bring home flowers for no reason. We're not talking $100 bouquets of roses here. Even the $10 bouquets from the supermarket are enough to make us smile.

Time. We understand relationships can't be all wine and roses; simply making the time to be with us and treating us like your top priority says "love" more than all the fancy gifts and lovely letters ever could. This includes helping around the house. The realities of a 21st-century relationship are that both partners probably work. If you happen to get home before we do, why not take vacuum the living room or throw in a load of laundry? If you take the garbage out without being asked, chances are you'll be getting a big ole smooch when you come back.

Dinner. Of the homemade variety. You may not be good at cooking and you may not know how to boil water. But greeting us at the door after a long day with fish sticks (or whatever you can wrastle up) makes us swoon, because it shows that you've been thinking about us and our hectic day.

Communication. Women are vocal creatures. We know you love us, but it's nice to hear you say it, too. We can also be insecure. We wish we weren't, but the reality is that we often notice our wobbly thighs and forget about our gorgeous eyes. So let us know when you think we're hot. Tell us we're beautiful. It helps us feel good. Plus, when we feel sexy we're more likely to act sexy. Words of appreciation aren't half-bad either. Tell us you love the lasagna we made. Thank us for driving the kids to school. Notice that we cleaned the bathtub. It doesn't have to be over the top, just let us know that you see the effort we put in, and you're grateful.

Consistency. This doesn't mean be boring and predictable. It means that we know you will (usually, no one is perfect!) give us the love and support we need. Knowing that you're coming at this with the same desires and energy as we are goes a long way to making us feel secure.

Engagement. Of the mental kind, not the "I'm getting married in the morning" kind. You don't have to like everything we like (we might be a little concerned if you do), but showing interest in our passions, be it career-related, a sport or a hobby, goes a long way. Listen when we talk to you. We're not speaking just so we can hear our own voice; we want to connect with you and this is one valuable way we do this. This also means paying attention to the little things. Whether it's the name of your best friend's husband or the fact that you hate Nicolas Cage movies, it's the little things you remember about us that's so endearing.

Humor and Humility. These two tend to go hand in hand. This doesn't mean that you have to crack jokes or entertain us, but just being able to laugh at yourself is enough. Guys who take themselves too seriously bring everyone down.

Challenge. Not the kind that makes a relationship constant work, but the good kind that surprises and motivates us to do, be or achieve what we desire. Studies show that partners who prod each other to meet goals—in other words, don't support lazy or bad habits—are ultimately happier than those who don't hold each other accountable.